You Are My Pieces.

There must be one true match, for every 99
If I am the puzzle, you are my pieces.misses;

Let's laugh at stuck ups and grin at our grooves,
strengths are in search to match the flaw let loose.

As we strive towards this journey, to be matched and be filled,
With each passing day becoming more fulfilled.

The joy awaits when all will make sense,
Meanwhile let's enjoy this workout intense.

After all, life is full of missing pieces...
But will that stop us from creating masterpieces...?
                                                         
If I am the puzzle, you are my pieces.

Give it a PLACE, not just a space.

Cleaning up the Mess

What is the most difficult everyday task for young people? Walking up the stairs? Running to catch the bus? Waking up on time...? comes close… but nothing, nothing beats the dreadful, uninspiring task of cleaning your room!  And, and, and… very important… to KEEP it clean. Recently, I have been harvesting some will power to organize my home. I started sorting my things into various categories and sub-categories, until I had a large pile of stuff in miscellaneous pile. I realized that my room is a mess because these things don’t have a designated place! Tada! May be if I put effort in finding a place for them, they can be shelved easily. 

"Let there be Light" at Neuschwanstein Castle, Germany

Just like things, there are many categories of relationships. You can’t exactly fit all of them under “Family” and “friends”. Some friends are more than family, and some family are more than friends. To make matters more complex, these relations change overtime. Every relation worth keeping, fulfills our unique emotional needs. They are all special because they relate to different aspects of our personality. 

Today, we live in a big mess of virtual relations. Dare to ask the question; are they worth keeping or throwing away? If they are worth keeping, they deserve a place. A place where u can foster them, appreciate them, and grow them.

 When a person in relationship says to another, “I need some space” What does that even mean? It probably translates to, " I don't feel like I have a place in your life, so, let's figure that out." New and old, changing and cruising, all relations need their places. Don’t let your relations exist in a vacuum. Don't just give it a space, but Give it a PLACE!

Richer than you think!

The Louvre Museum, Paris

This past year I visited a small country called Monte Carlo (Monaco) located near south of France and Italian border.  You have to be both rich and famous to become a legal residence of this country. Today, number one lucrative target for the 20 somethings, even in this recession economy, is to be rich. Yah, Yah ... we all have heard that money can’t buy happiness but do we actually believe that? It makes me think what does “richness” really mean?

1 million? 100 million? How many zeros would it take for me to feel rich? If you get a chance, talk to people who have all the zeros you want, and they can tell you honestly how they feel. I would simply define richness is when you posses something that the other person does not have. It is nothing new, we all know that the concept of rich and poor is relative. It’s a battle of haves and have-nots.

Here is the formula to feel like the richest person in the world...in 30 seconds! Ready. Set. Go. 

Since each one of us are unique, it is very easy to see that we all must have something that someone else doesn't.  

• Experiences. 
• Relations. 
• Talents.
• Beliefs. 
• Goals. 
• Abilities. 
• And disabilities that have the potential of turning into abilities. The list goes on.

Feel richer by experiences you have had. (Travelling brings such experiences, and therefore it is the only expense, that makes you richer.) Feel richer by the quality of relations you have in your life. (As I read this somewhere, “Some people are so poor they only have money.”) It could be as simple as knowing a shortcut route to work or being able to cook to everyone's taste. Feel the richness by being able to dream beyond your capacity and by overcoming every day challenges with a smile on your face!

Usually, it’s not our money that makes others jealous, rather it is our happiness. Hence, being happy with ourselves is the greatest bank balance u can have! If we only think a little and realize our uniqueness, we are much much much... richer than we think! 

---
Extras:
A relevant quote by Mr. Fred Rogers.

Live like a Tourist!

Live like a tourist!

When I visited my old college after 2 years, I suddenly noticed an intricate detail on the balcony window of the corner building. Even though I have walked this street thousands of times, I have completely failed to notice it! Which made me wonder... what else have I missed walking with my head down? In a sidewalk full of people trying to get by you or a crowd waiting for the pedestrian signal to turn green, can you tell the difference between a tourist and a local? My observation is that people walking with their head down are locals; people walking with their heads up are travelers!

I have met many people who have not seen world renowned tourist sites in their hometown, but have travelled greatly to other places! To youths in Europe, America is “modern, happening, open-minded” country. Whereas Americans believe that living/travelling to Europe is “infinitely cooler”! We often take the place where we live for granted, don’t we?

Travellers get excited about each corner of the city. Their camera click every little details on the building, mail boxes, buses, phone booths, trams, train stations and even the sewage covers on the sidewalks! For travelers, it’s about enjoying the journey, and for locals it’s about getting to the destination as fast as possible. However, if we decide to see our local town with traveller's lens, we can have the best of both worlds. Let's fuel some enthusiasm in the same boring commute and stir some excitement.
Being at a new place is awesome, but there is nothing more thrilling than being able to see the “same-old” thing/place/day with a new light! Did you know that just walking on the different end of the street (ie. right sidewalk, vs. left sidewalk) can greatly change your perspective of the street? Try it!

Diving into Details: at Prague, July 2012

Here is what travelling has taught me so far: 

• Before you decide where you should go, you should evaluate where you are coming from. Only then you would be able to better appreciate where you are/will be. [also true for life...]
• People make places, not the other way around. 
• Travelling is a challenging mission, only a rare few will be able to mentally accompany you. Choose your company wisely! 
• Your camera has seen it all, but have you? Limit your photography temptations, so you can truly enjoy the experience beyond what fits in a 4X6 frame. 
• By only comparing: you waste your time. 
• By acknowledging the differences: you learn. 
• and ONLY when you start noticing similarities... you come to wonderful realizations. 

Next time you take an evening walk in your neighborhood, put on your curious hat and fill your eyes with a sparkle of a tourist. I guarantee that your experience will be close to winning a free vacation package on a remote island! :P
Bon voyage!

The sun rises from the west...

The rise of SANSKRIT IN GERMANY

Have you travelled somewhere, and experienced the discomfort of not understanding a laguage being spoken around you? It's quite frustrating. However, today I am writing this note to share an experience that was beyond frustrating.

Past Friday, I took time off work and attended the closing ceremony of Summer school in spoken Sankrit at South Asian Institute, Heidelberg University,Germany. It was a relatively small event with big undertaking. 13 students from all over the world attended this 2 week long intensive course in spoken Sanskrit.  At the event, they presented long speeches, a sanskrit play, and sang many subhashitas in Sanskrit. The entire program was conducted in Sanskrit.

Now, if I say that apart from 3-4 students, majority of students were NOT from South-Asian origin, would you believe it? It was not some Youtube video, I actually experienced it live. The group of students included professors, professionals from different area, and different religious background. When I talked to students, I learned that for some of them their sole motivation was their interest in this langugae and all forms of wisdom it leads to! And on the other hand, we sit in our homes, our schools and education institutions... and question, why should we learn Sanksrit?

I reached there, the program started and the first presenter was a student from Leipzig University, German origin... read a 10 page long speech...completely in sanskrit. I was sitting there, trying very hard to make sense of it all, but I could only understand it in parts. This moment was beyond frustrating when I realized that this is not German, French, Italian, or English...its *Sanskrit*, it's my own language, and yet I cannot understand it.

When a German person speaks German to me, and I don't understand...I can live with that. But what could be more embarrassing then a German person speaking Sanskrit in front of me, and I do not understand a word of it!!! 

An orthodox christian presenter said this in sanskrit, " Like fruits depend on the tree, and a tree depends on the roots... sanskrit is the root of Bharat, and without Bharat the world will be poor."

Should we sit and wait some more years, we shall see a day when more people of non-south asian origin will be knowing/speaking/studying sanskrit than the people who it absolutely belongs to... but they have massively failed to value it.

I felt more "closer to home" that day, than I have felt in many years!

***
Related article: Why Should My Child Study Sanksrit? (Extreamly eye opening article, must read!)

Coming Up Next...

Coming Up Next
When I passed 7th grade, I was told "aa! that was nothing, wait until you are in high school!" In 12th grade I was warned, " oh! this is just a start, watch out for university!" After getting two degrees from top institutions in my country, today, I am cautioned, " Blah! This is peanuts compare to what you will face in the real world!"

Notice the trend here? We are genetically and socially wired to think that the next step is harder, more difficult, and more challenging than the one we have just finished taking. Is it really? My recent realization is that it's not always the case. How challenging is putting your left foot forward, once you have already landed your right foot on the ground? .... If anything, it's easier. For all these years, I was living in an illusion that the next step is much harder than the previous one, just because it's "coming up next".

Regardless of how hard the next step is, this entire attitude of fearing your incompatibility to what is coming next, is highly destructive. Instead we should adopt the perspective, that what I have accomplished so far, has made me capable of dealing with the next phase in my life. Yes, I have new challenges but may be,just may be, I am also blessed with new motivation, new friends, new direction and new guidelines along the way. Have I failed to notice these?

The key word is "new". Because we are stepping into a new zone, ( not any "harder" or "easier" per se), that novelty (unknown) is the root of our fears. But if and when it is geared properly, the same "unknown" can create much needed spark in our routine oriented life!

When infants learn to roll over, sit up, crawl, stand up, and finally start walking... Every step of their development is celebrated as a milestone of the next. There are milestones laying around all over the sand of time and on the beaches of our lives. All we need to do, is acknowledge them, appreciate them, celebrate them!

Next time you get nervous about what is coming up next try repeating this to yourself:  " oh! the hard part is already over! I have already learned how to stand, so now walking is easy!" :)

Cheers to our lives made easy!

Exercise Expectations

PART I: I have potential
At any stage in life, we often feel like the ant squished under a mountain of expectations. Even as a child we are expected to behave a certain way. Although we cannot make everyone happy, and fulfill all the expectations bestowed upon us, we must learn not to let them effect us in a negative way. There are two ways of looking at it 1) I am not good enough. or 2) I have potential to be better. Our happiness depends upon how we choose to think.

When I think about expectations on other entities in this universe, expectations on me seems quite minor. For example, the sun is expected to rise at a certain time. The whole world depends on sunlight to wake up, to eat, to grow and to live. Wow! What a huge responsibility? Though, I wonder if the Sun ever feels the burden of expectations like we do. Probably it doesn't, because it has made those expectations part of its identity. In fact, it is not that we expect the Sun to rise, but the one which rises every day, we call it the Sun. Similarly, our character should define the type of expectations we receive from others. 

Also, the Sun does not care if you wake up when it rises, it rises anyway. It doesn't wait for you to finish work before it sets, it sets anyway. Whether you expect or not, it spreads warmth anyway. When a quality is woven in our character, even if people stop expecting/caring/paying attention on that aspect of our personality it remains with us. The burden of expectations will stop being the burden the day we will realize them as our potential. The day we are able to accept that this is who I should be, I want to be and I will strive to be. We certainly cannot entertain every expectation that comes our way, but we must choose a few and take them as a starting point. Let the expectations upon us draw a guideline for our behavior and eventually guide our character development. 

PART II: Relative Expectations

The bulk of expectations that matters to us the most are usually from our friends and family. So, I have decided to discuss expectations specifically in the context of relations.

Why do we expect on the first place? My theory is that our expectations are directly proportional to our investment. Just as our investment of time and money in education comes with a certain career expectations, our investment of time and emotions in relationships accompany expectations. I view relationships as an emotional investment. We don’t expect the same from someone we just met versus our friends and family members. Why? Because we have not invested as much (time, efforts, sentiments) in the person we just met as oppose to those we have known for a while. It’s as simple as that!

Often we feel unhappy because we are not getting the same bang for our buck. We “feel” that we have invested so much in certain relationships and are not getting enough return. Our sky-high expectation for perfection from our loved ones is impossible to meet! It is not that we don’t get a proper return for our investment... the trouble is that we foolishly overestimate our investment, and underestimate our gain. Our terrible accounting skills are the root cause of our unhappiness, especially when it comes to emotional accounts.

Let’s remember that as a human being we all expect, and we always will. Where there is love, there are bound to be expectations. Therefore, love beyond expectations is extremely rare, challenging and considered an element of divinity. Paradoxically, the place where we are closest to finding such selfless love is also our family and friends. To expect is humanity, to not expect is divinity. Therefore, find peace in knowing that the only person we should expect from is our own selves and the only expectation we should bestowed upon ourselves is to expect nothing at all.

On a Long Drive!

J- for Journey

It is so easy to gain a narrow perspective in our life, and even easier to focus on yourself, here and now. When I had the following two conversation with different people (Names have been changed to protect their identity), I felt like I have woken up from a dream and finally shook hands with reality. I want to extend this feeling to my readers and have you enjoy this post...

***

On Suzie’s 50th birthday:
Me:  Hey, congratulations... 50th b'day is great, you have achieved so much. Great family, Great job, everything is settled, you have everything, you have got nothing to worry about.
Suzie: well, you still have something I don’t have.
Me: What’s that?
Suzie said:  Options. You still have all the options open in your life. Take advantage of it. 

***

"Dare to Fly" at London Jun 2012

I was completely taken back, and did not realized what I had was so valuable. From my perspective my options created confusion in my life. Not knowing what's next can be frustrating. Being stuck in a temporary failure cycle when u are trying to find/define your niche can be mentally draining. However, when I saw myself from her perspective, I felt like I had wings... I could practically fly anywhere ! 

***

Jasmine is 23. She is educated from a top university, found a well paying job, has a perfect boyfriend, and her parents are really well off (happy and enjoying their life).
Me: Hey, you are so young, and you have everything laid out for you. How awesome is that?
Jasmine: That’s what. There is nothing to look forward to in my life. It’s all saturated. At least you have something to look forward to.
***
She was right. Not being happy with what we have and where we are is one thing. But the fact that we need someone else's misery to realize the value of what we have is plain pathetic. What a shame!

Since then I realized, that even after reaching a destination, the one thing we miss the most, is the journey itself. We always need something to look forward to in our lives. The most difficult part is not reaching a destination but choosing to accept that you have arrived. Choosing to see and realized that where you have reached is where you needed to be and wanted to be on the first place. The most difficult part is defining your destination, and remembering that definition when you have arrived. [ For example, the difficult part is not falling in love, or being in love, but probably the most difficult part is choosing to admit it. ;) ]

The ideal destination is not where the journey ends, but from where a new journey can begin.  We might feel that others around us are happier than us, because they have reached their destination (by finding their passion, obtaining their dream job, or finding a true love), but if we look closely, where they have reached are only pit-stops in this long journey of life. And the key to happiness is to take life as a LONG DRIVE...and be in the constant search of new roads we can explore, it could be a hobby, a passion, a dance class, computer software, reading a book, learning a new language... or just simply being a better person. 

Congratulate yourself for having a LIFE... that IS A JOURNEY of infinite destinations...!

***
Related quotes:

• "It has been said that we need just three things in life: Something to do, Something to look forward to and someone to love."- Maya Angelou (American Author and Poet)

• "The powerful motivator in our lives isn’t money; it’s the opportunity to learn, grow in responsibilities, contribute to others, and be recognized for achievements."-Frederick Herzberg

Sorry, I am busy!

Friends, this post is not written by me per se. Though, it fits well with the purpose of this blog. and No matter, when , where or how many times we read it... It is a great reminder! So, next time we are too busy to have coffee with our friends... we must ask ourselves... do we have our priorities straight? Enjoy the read...

*******************************************************************************
A STORY:
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.He then asked the students, if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. 

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - family,children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions – Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else --The small stuff.
'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, You will never have room for the things that are important to you. 

So...

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play With your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

'Take care of the golf balls first --The things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand. One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled 'I'm glad you asked'. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,

There’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Passion for Life

Passion flower from a passion fruit vine

Passion= Cause + Courage + Commitment

“Everyone dies, but not everyone lives!”

Really, what does it require for us to live? Air, water, food, money?  I would argue - a passion!  

Every morning I wake up, but the day I want to get something done... I GET UP! 

Every night I fall asleep, but when I have a plan for the next day... I go to bed!

And that is the difference between existing and living. 

Apart form some extremely lucky individuals who have found their passion, most of us are in the boat with a torch searching for our passion. Let me share a personal, real-life conversation that has inspired this article.

An aged woman: Hey, how are u Zarna?
Me: Yah, everything is good but I am waiting to find my passion.

An aged woman: Though, make sure it is not too late. You know, one day u will turn 40, and your life will slowly start sleeping away; then, you will realize that your true passion is... life itself! When you are in your sixties, all you would want to do is ... LIVE few more years...then, just few more and then few more!

That's when I realized that Life itself is our #1 passion! 

We may be on a scavenger hunt searching for our "passion" without realizing that we are already living one!

Still, just to calm down all those people bombarding us with, " find ur passion", " life is nothing without passion", etc...etc... Here is my insight into how we can pave our passion. Because in my opinion- passion, like other virtues, can be developed over time. It is a combination of cause, courage and commitment. And by this definition, anyone who develops a courage to commit to a cause, can develop  a passion.  

So, its as simple as A, B, C. Just pick a cause, and develop courage to commit to it. In this ever so messed up world, we may run out of resources, but we will never run out of causes to fight for. If you are in doubt, check out this innovative initiative, "pick a fight" started by everyday people like you and me. http://www.pickafight.in/  

 " We cannot be sure of having something to live for unless we are willing to die for it."- Che Guavara

Make your Passion the brand new Fashion! :-) 
___
If you have found your passion, kindly share in the comment section for the readers  of this blog! Thank YOU!

Religion: Fragrance of Life

Indeed, religion is a fragrance of life. It adds a plus value to our daily routine, which creates the zeal towards living. As the saying goes, it is not how long you live, but how you live that is important. If we want to learn the art of healthy living, religion can be the easiest way to achieve that goal. To live life at its best, we must understand the value of religion in our life.

But, how can religion be essence of life, when there are so many wars fought in the name of religion? The forces that give rise to riots and communal violence usually have little interest in religion itself. They use religion as a tool to fight their own personal battle of power, pride and money. As a result of these incidences, today the masses have stopped believing in religion all together. People now think that moving away from religion and taking God out of their life would be a better idea to solve problems. Has it solve anything?

The word 'religion' has a root word in Latin "religare", which means to be bound, or re-bound. Religion is a boundary, a set of guidelines within which we all must act. More like a code of conduct, following which can lead to content living. Contrary to the common perception these days, religion may or may not have to do with belief in God.  We may choose not to take sides of religious wars by boycotting the belief that "God is fearful", but we shall not ignore the core idea of religion which is to follow one's duty.

The byproduct of our suspicion in God's existence had us started ignoring and compromising our duties as citizens, family members, teachers, doctors, and students. We have become close minded and self-centered to the point where even if someone has done something good for us, we suspect their intentions. We have simply lost belief that unconditional love or aid exists! We are taught from childhood to focus solely on our self-interest. This is the reality we live in- half the world is ready to die in the name of religion, and the other half has started discarding the name of religion from their life.

The choice is ours: we can eliminate the religion and lose the guidelines to the ultimate happiness or apply the fundamental principles of religion in our life and discover happiness in any given situation. The bound of religion is like holding on to a rope by which we can walk through the darkest tunnel and the trail by which we can find our way in the densest forest. When we hold onto a religion our journey becomes much smoother through sorrow and happiness. Above all, religion provides that perfect attitude towards life which can motivate us to live and to live with pride. Religion is the revised vision: vision of life, society and the future.
____

As published in April 2009 issue of Superior Star Magazine
Written during the final year of undergraduate, University of Toronto.

Gift of Forgiveness

For-GIVE

I still remember my reaction when I saw the first homeless person (a beggar) in Toronto Subway (underground train network) for the first time. I was puzzled as to what can I give to someone who lives in a country with free health care, unemployment insurance and a welfare system?  In the subsequent years, I have given them food, money, smiles, stares, but most of all just pure ignorance! Passing by them every day, my thoughts exactly, “ What can I give? I am just a student, with my own debt to pay and no job guaranteed after my graduation.”

I was naive enough to think 

Giving--- requires me to have money

Giving--- can only be in monetary form (except may be food)

Giving--- will make me poor , and someone else richer.

aaaah! Stupid shallow teenage philosophies! 

*****

Christmas is the season of giving.  And giving comes in many forms...

We can stop by a stranger and give a minute of our time to strike a conversation... or we can crack a joke and make someone laugh... or

we can give up a parking spot for someone... or dial a number from our contacts and say words of appreciation. If we want to, and if we care to, there are limitless act of kindness that are well within our reach.  

Though, the greatest gift of all is forgiveness.  On the birth day of Jesus Christ, who has forgiven all sins of mankind, we can too practice small acts of forgiveness.

Let us forgive those who weren’t there when we needed them the most. Forgive those who may have hurt us with or without intentions.  Forgive a friend who has not picked up your call, or a family member who could not comprehend you at all. Forgive the teacher that did not believe in you, and the boss who saw much less in you. Most vital of all, forgive yourself for being so unforgiving; and rise to embrace your new self that lives FOR- GIVING.

Though, dare not to forgive those tears for falling at the wrong time, and the smile that disappeared from time to time. In this upcoming year, they both shall be punished hard, the tears must only flow when you smile at heart. Look at the chaos our unforgiveness has done, forget the Old, now! that the New has begun.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all!

Much love.

Zarna

...
Additional links related to this topic:
The wisdom of forgiving

Used vs. Loved

Today, I dared to stand between the age old battle of living vs. Non-living. In my recent experience of shifting my home, I ended up throwing out 50% of things in my room. It was an eye opening experience, as to how many things we accumulate, and how many things we can do without. In some cases, the decisions were painful. How to choose between things you value, things you need, and things you want? 

Why are we so attached to Things- which never speaks, never reacts and never show any emotions? May be that’s exactly why…! Because they don’t speak, react or express, they are easy to rule over. Being in possession of things, we feel empowered. Anarchy is long gone, but the desire to rule relics in our hearts. [May be that’s why we find joy in keeping pets and servants]. The mere idea that something is “MINE” is enough to have us feel important. Furthermore, some things get passed on from generation to generation. Things have a fascinating potential to outlast people and remain Immortal! 

Materialism focuses on things so much that we forget that its value is because of people. What is the use of a phone if there remains no one to call to? Or receive call from? Even on the web, most popular sites are those that connect you with people (eg. facebook), not things.

People__are__mortal, and therefore, they should be valued more, loved more, and cherished more. “Things are to be used and people are to be loved. The problem in today's world is that people are used while things are loved.” (Full story below)

The question is: are we living for things? Or do we need things to live?
Do we value people based on things, or value things based on people?

People we grew up with are no longer around us, people we see today may not be there tomorrow, which is why our time with people is precious, and priceless. Let us reflect on that and make sure to leave some time for people while we race against time to achieve “things”.

Moral of the story: Things are NO-thing without People.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE STORY

Used vs. Loved

While a man was polishing his new car,his 4 yr old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car. In anger, the man took the child's hand and hit it many times not realizing he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures. When the child saw his father.....
with painful eyes he asked, 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?'

The man was so hurt and speechless; he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times. Devastated by his own actions......sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches;
the child had written ' I LOVE YOU DAD'. The next day that man committed suicide. .

Anger and Love have no limits; choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely life & remember this:
Things are to be used and people are to be loved.
The problem in today's world is that people are used while things are loved.

Let's try always to keep this thought in mind: Things are to be used, People are to be loved.

 

Feeling Lonely?

Alone we Stand, Together we Stumble!

Despite of always being surrounded by people (and in some cases, domesticated animals), the curse of feeling lonely seems inevitable. The feeling of loneliness is a byproduct of modern society which relentlessly preaches individualism. As soon as we define ourselves as an individual; we start to stand alone. Being unique, independent, and a merely an individual, comes with the curse of loneliness.

Just because we are surrounded by people, doesn't mean they share the consequences of our actions, decisions and choices. We stand alone in our responsibilities for ourselves. We alone are responsible for maintenance and development of each and every aspect of our life, whether it is physical/health, economical, social, or spiritual. Especially in spirituality, every soul is treated as an individual.  Everyone has their unique account of karmas, virtues, and “fate”.

Ok, so we may be on our own in the world of metaphysics, but that is not the same as “feeling” lonely. In the physical world, feeling of loneliness arises from the fact that just like us... our ideas, our passions and our perspectives also stand alone. Anything we propose the mass will dispose. Make a new suggestion anywhere, and the reactionary answer, 90% of the time, will be “NO”.

‎" If you stand for a reason, be prepared to stand like a tree. If you fall onto the ground, fall like seed that grows back to fight again."

And that’s where we stumble!

Our motivation is diluted by free floating skepticism in the society. Our conviction is questioned every step of the way. By their “default standards”, our virtues are presented as our weaknesses. Just because they have nothing to believe in, their sole mission is to confuse everyone else who does.

And that’s where we stumble!

The challenge is no to stumble, and even if we do... get back up, again, again and yet again. Let the skepticism of others fuel our determination.

Great people have always walked alone. Any new idea faces resistance. It is this friction between ideas and resistance that has sparked revolutions. Standing alone for a vision, which anyone else is yet to share, is an absolute gift!

We all have been taught the power of "togetherness", though dare not to underestimate the power of ONE. One that can bind many. One that can lead many. One that can inspire many. In an ocean full of salt, ONE spoon of sugar brings a ray of hope. One is a start, without which only zero will remain. ONE is what turns nothing into something. There requires only one match to start a fire and only one seed to grow a tree. 

Don’t fail to realize that often times we are alone because we are ahead, not because we are left behind. Leaders are always a handful, where as followers are many.  

First take a stand. And if you must, stand alone!

---

Related quotes: 
"Be strong enough to stand alone, be yourself enough to stand apart, but be wise enough to stand together when the time comes." From The Idealist

Made for Each Other

 Made for Each Other

To wake up or not to wake up, that is the question! ---"But do I really have a choice?"---Well, sweetheart! here is a news for you: Yes, You do have a choice.

Give me no options, and I will feel constrained! Give me more options, and I will be confused. What to do... ? The truth is, although we crave for choices and we like having them around, more often than not, we fail to handle them. 

Offer me two flavors of ice cream and I will start scratching my head, let alone two different career options! Life is a big fat maze of choices, and the good news is, as long as we are not stuck in a loop of bad choices, we are bound to make it through. Fewh! Of course, choices are difficult to make...and we are never quite ready to make them, but eventually we have to give in to the time factor. After all, how long can you stand in the middle of crossroads before u get run over? :D

The peculiar thing about choices is: we have no choice but to make them. :D

Do we really make our choices? or have our choices made us (who we are)? Interestingly, we are both the cause and the effect of our choices. That's why we need to be extra careful about what we choose, and why we chose it. Good or bad, right or wrong, as long as we remember the "why" behind our choices, we will never have to regret them, ever! 

After all, "Good judgment (choices) comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment (choices)." To realize good from bad, is usually the most challenging aspect. which may require another post...or two to explain! LOL

Here is another quote I heard recently on a TV show, 

 " In life, some choices, we make for ourselves, and some we make for others. Not because we don't love them, but because we do. The only way we know it's right is if it let's us stay true to ourselves."  

...hmm... How many times have we chose to opt out for others?  Do we regret it today? If so, then have we forgotten the "why" behind our choices? 

Please remember the reasons and remove all the regrets from your heart.

Recollect, Revive and Restore yourself. Because for a change, your choices has made you who you are !

Raising a toast to the star couple tonight,

I and my choices: absolutely positively made for each other! 

 ---
Stream Through blogspot life is a game divine.
(Gem from April 12, 2011)

The F word

The F word:

Ever since we became aware of human relations, we have been surrounded by the F word. Whether its the first day of kindergarten, second day of school, or the third day of college, we have been using the F word...all along! In the world full of 7 billion people, we define majority of our positive interactions as the F word! Whether we use it , misuse it, or abuse it, this word can never leave us alone. 

Lets roll some guesses...

F is for food, F is for Family, F is for facebook,

and finally, the word that turns a nobody into somebody is "FRIEND". There has been so much said about friends and friendships, this topic almost feels over done! It wasn't until I read the following quote, I realized that there is still a lot to be said on friendship.

" We spend so much time looking for a true friend, that we forget to build true friendships."

This quote gives a new perspective on friendship. Friendship is a two way street. You are surrounded by people all the time, and the only way you don't have friends, is if you have failed to be one. It is not about finding the right people, but its about being the right person. Why be a piece of metal, when u can be a magnet?

I don't know how to define "a true friend" or "a friend" for that matter. And in the era where being a Facebook Friend is the biggest trend, no definition would even do justice to this pious relationship. 


Friendship is a responsibility. Once, we have decided to be friends, we are responsible for each others well being. If my friend is on a wrong path, and I know about it, it is my responsibility to do everything in my power to prevent him/her.


In a society where an entire armamentarium of legal and social bonds fails to guarantee a lasting marriage, friendship is precious because it can last a lifetime without any need of a legal status. 


We must keep a close eye on our friendships, because often they break in a deep silence.  Break the silence, take an initiative, call an old friend today just to say hi. 
Write an email...Plan a movie...Organize a reunion... 

Remember, it takes a true friend in order to find and keep a true friend.

Have a friendly day.

---

Happiness = Being YOU!

"No one can make a man happy, he must learn how to be happy!"

Correct me if I am wrong, but here are my realizations for today.

Purpose of life--> happiness. 

What is happiness?--> only you can decide for yourself.

What about other's (people we love) happiness?--> Indirectly, your happiness should be their happiness. and Directly, they are as much on their own as you are, when it comes to finding their happiness. 

The question is: Can we really make anyone else happy? Especially, 1) if they haven't learned how to be happy or 2) if  we are becoming unhappy ourselves (in the process)?

...Then, who are we fooling all this time?

If you survey some of the most "unhappy-zones" in your life, you may find that those are the times you were put in a situation where you could not be yourself (partially or fully). Sometimes we might have "valid" restraints, but most times it may be that we have just accepted the situation (including our new-self), and decided to live with it. 

And being yourself doesn't mean carrying the "go to hell" attitude! It also doesn't mean being arrogant or ignoring other people's influence on our lives. Actually, it's exactly opposite. It's about listening carefully to your inner voice, and being humble to your own soul. By doing that, you will automatically be humble to others, because u will start putting some soul into everything you do, and say. And that's my friends is the highway to happiness! 

So, next time, when u start being unhappy, ask yourself, "Have I started being someone else?"  

As the lyrics from a famous song goes: "Happiness runs in the circular motion, you can have everything if you let your self be!"- 1968, Donovan (Scottish singer)

Cheers! to being yourself!

---

(Gems of the day, Feb 19, 2011)