Gift of Forgiveness

For-GIVE

I still remember my reaction when I saw the first homeless person (a beggar) in Toronto Subway (underground train network) for the first time. I was puzzled as to what can I give to someone who lives in a country with free health care, unemployment insurance and a welfare system?  In the subsequent years, I have given them food, money, smiles, stares, but most of all just pure ignorance! Passing by them every day, my thoughts exactly, “ What can I give? I am just a student, with my own debt to pay and no job guaranteed after my graduation.”

I was naive enough to think 

Giving--- requires me to have money

Giving--- can only be in monetary form (except may be food)

Giving--- will make me poor , and someone else richer.

aaaah! Stupid shallow teenage philosophies! 

*****

Christmas is the season of giving.  And giving comes in many forms...

We can stop by a stranger and give a minute of our time to strike a conversation... or we can crack a joke and make someone laugh... or

we can give up a parking spot for someone... or dial a number from our contacts and say words of appreciation. If we want to, and if we care to, there are limitless act of kindness that are well within our reach.  

Though, the greatest gift of all is forgiveness.  On the birth day of Jesus Christ, who has forgiven all sins of mankind, we can too practice small acts of forgiveness.

Let us forgive those who weren’t there when we needed them the most. Forgive those who may have hurt us with or without intentions.  Forgive a friend who has not picked up your call, or a family member who could not comprehend you at all. Forgive the teacher that did not believe in you, and the boss who saw much less in you. Most vital of all, forgive yourself for being so unforgiving; and rise to embrace your new self that lives FOR- GIVING.

Though, dare not to forgive those tears for falling at the wrong time, and the smile that disappeared from time to time. In this upcoming year, they both shall be punished hard, the tears must only flow when you smile at heart. Look at the chaos our unforgiveness has done, forget the Old, now! that the New has begun.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all!

Much love.

Zarna

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Additional links related to this topic:
The wisdom of forgiving

Used vs. Loved

Today, I dared to stand between the age old battle of living vs. Non-living. In my recent experience of shifting my home, I ended up throwing out 50% of things in my room. It was an eye opening experience, as to how many things we accumulate, and how many things we can do without. In some cases, the decisions were painful. How to choose between things you value, things you need, and things you want? 

Why are we so attached to Things- which never speaks, never reacts and never show any emotions? May be that’s exactly why…! Because they don’t speak, react or express, they are easy to rule over. Being in possession of things, we feel empowered. Anarchy is long gone, but the desire to rule relics in our hearts. [May be that’s why we find joy in keeping pets and servants]. The mere idea that something is “MINE” is enough to have us feel important. Furthermore, some things get passed on from generation to generation. Things have a fascinating potential to outlast people and remain Immortal! 

Materialism focuses on things so much that we forget that its value is because of people. What is the use of a phone if there remains no one to call to? Or receive call from? Even on the web, most popular sites are those that connect you with people (eg. facebook), not things.

People__are__mortal, and therefore, they should be valued more, loved more, and cherished more. “Things are to be used and people are to be loved. The problem in today's world is that people are used while things are loved.” (Full story below)

The question is: are we living for things? Or do we need things to live?
Do we value people based on things, or value things based on people?

People we grew up with are no longer around us, people we see today may not be there tomorrow, which is why our time with people is precious, and priceless. Let us reflect on that and make sure to leave some time for people while we race against time to achieve “things”.

Moral of the story: Things are NO-thing without People.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE STORY

Used vs. Loved

While a man was polishing his new car,his 4 yr old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car. In anger, the man took the child's hand and hit it many times not realizing he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures. When the child saw his father.....
with painful eyes he asked, 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?'

The man was so hurt and speechless; he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times. Devastated by his own actions......sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches;
the child had written ' I LOVE YOU DAD'. The next day that man committed suicide. .

Anger and Love have no limits; choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely life & remember this:
Things are to be used and people are to be loved.
The problem in today's world is that people are used while things are loved.

Let's try always to keep this thought in mind: Things are to be used, People are to be loved.

 

Feeling Lonely?

Alone we Stand, Together we Stumble!

Despite of always being surrounded by people (and in some cases, domesticated animals), the curse of feeling lonely seems inevitable. The feeling of loneliness is a byproduct of modern society which relentlessly preaches individualism. As soon as we define ourselves as an individual; we start to stand alone. Being unique, independent, and a merely an individual, comes with the curse of loneliness.

Just because we are surrounded by people, doesn't mean they share the consequences of our actions, decisions and choices. We stand alone in our responsibilities for ourselves. We alone are responsible for maintenance and development of each and every aspect of our life, whether it is physical/health, economical, social, or spiritual. Especially in spirituality, every soul is treated as an individual.  Everyone has their unique account of karmas, virtues, and “fate”.

Ok, so we may be on our own in the world of metaphysics, but that is not the same as “feeling” lonely. In the physical world, feeling of loneliness arises from the fact that just like us... our ideas, our passions and our perspectives also stand alone. Anything we propose the mass will dispose. Make a new suggestion anywhere, and the reactionary answer, 90% of the time, will be “NO”.

‎" If you stand for a reason, be prepared to stand like a tree. If you fall onto the ground, fall like seed that grows back to fight again."

And that’s where we stumble!

Our motivation is diluted by free floating skepticism in the society. Our conviction is questioned every step of the way. By their “default standards”, our virtues are presented as our weaknesses. Just because they have nothing to believe in, their sole mission is to confuse everyone else who does.

And that’s where we stumble!

The challenge is no to stumble, and even if we do... get back up, again, again and yet again. Let the skepticism of others fuel our determination.

Great people have always walked alone. Any new idea faces resistance. It is this friction between ideas and resistance that has sparked revolutions. Standing alone for a vision, which anyone else is yet to share, is an absolute gift!

We all have been taught the power of "togetherness", though dare not to underestimate the power of ONE. One that can bind many. One that can lead many. One that can inspire many. In an ocean full of salt, ONE spoon of sugar brings a ray of hope. One is a start, without which only zero will remain. ONE is what turns nothing into something. There requires only one match to start a fire and only one seed to grow a tree. 

Don’t fail to realize that often times we are alone because we are ahead, not because we are left behind. Leaders are always a handful, where as followers are many.  

First take a stand. And if you must, stand alone!

---

Related quotes: 
"Be strong enough to stand alone, be yourself enough to stand apart, but be wise enough to stand together when the time comes." From The Idealist

Made for Each Other

 Made for Each Other

To wake up or not to wake up, that is the question! ---"But do I really have a choice?"---Well, sweetheart! here is a news for you: Yes, You do have a choice.

Give me no options, and I will feel constrained! Give me more options, and I will be confused. What to do... ? The truth is, although we crave for choices and we like having them around, more often than not, we fail to handle them. 

Offer me two flavors of ice cream and I will start scratching my head, let alone two different career options! Life is a big fat maze of choices, and the good news is, as long as we are not stuck in a loop of bad choices, we are bound to make it through. Fewh! Of course, choices are difficult to make...and we are never quite ready to make them, but eventually we have to give in to the time factor. After all, how long can you stand in the middle of crossroads before u get run over? :D

The peculiar thing about choices is: we have no choice but to make them. :D

Do we really make our choices? or have our choices made us (who we are)? Interestingly, we are both the cause and the effect of our choices. That's why we need to be extra careful about what we choose, and why we chose it. Good or bad, right or wrong, as long as we remember the "why" behind our choices, we will never have to regret them, ever! 

After all, "Good judgment (choices) comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment (choices)." To realize good from bad, is usually the most challenging aspect. which may require another post...or two to explain! LOL

Here is another quote I heard recently on a TV show, 

 " In life, some choices, we make for ourselves, and some we make for others. Not because we don't love them, but because we do. The only way we know it's right is if it let's us stay true to ourselves."  

...hmm... How many times have we chose to opt out for others?  Do we regret it today? If so, then have we forgotten the "why" behind our choices? 

Please remember the reasons and remove all the regrets from your heart.

Recollect, Revive and Restore yourself. Because for a change, your choices has made you who you are !

Raising a toast to the star couple tonight,

I and my choices: absolutely positively made for each other! 

 ---
Stream Through blogspot life is a game divine.
(Gem from April 12, 2011)

The F word

The F word:

Ever since we became aware of human relations, we have been surrounded by the F word. Whether its the first day of kindergarten, second day of school, or the third day of college, we have been using the F word...all along! In the world full of 7 billion people, we define majority of our positive interactions as the F word! Whether we use it , misuse it, or abuse it, this word can never leave us alone. 

Lets roll some guesses...

F is for food, F is for Family, F is for facebook,

and finally, the word that turns a nobody into somebody is "FRIEND". There has been so much said about friends and friendships, this topic almost feels over done! It wasn't until I read the following quote, I realized that there is still a lot to be said on friendship.

" We spend so much time looking for a true friend, that we forget to build true friendships."

This quote gives a new perspective on friendship. Friendship is a two way street. You are surrounded by people all the time, and the only way you don't have friends, is if you have failed to be one. It is not about finding the right people, but its about being the right person. Why be a piece of metal, when u can be a magnet?

I don't know how to define "a true friend" or "a friend" for that matter. And in the era where being a Facebook Friend is the biggest trend, no definition would even do justice to this pious relationship. 


Friendship is a responsibility. Once, we have decided to be friends, we are responsible for each others well being. If my friend is on a wrong path, and I know about it, it is my responsibility to do everything in my power to prevent him/her.


In a society where an entire armamentarium of legal and social bonds fails to guarantee a lasting marriage, friendship is precious because it can last a lifetime without any need of a legal status. 


We must keep a close eye on our friendships, because often they break in a deep silence.  Break the silence, take an initiative, call an old friend today just to say hi. 
Write an email...Plan a movie...Organize a reunion... 

Remember, it takes a true friend in order to find and keep a true friend.

Have a friendly day.

---

Happiness = Being YOU!

"No one can make a man happy, he must learn how to be happy!"

Correct me if I am wrong, but here are my realizations for today.

Purpose of life--> happiness. 

What is happiness?--> only you can decide for yourself.

What about other's (people we love) happiness?--> Indirectly, your happiness should be their happiness. and Directly, they are as much on their own as you are, when it comes to finding their happiness. 

The question is: Can we really make anyone else happy? Especially, 1) if they haven't learned how to be happy or 2) if  we are becoming unhappy ourselves (in the process)?

...Then, who are we fooling all this time?

If you survey some of the most "unhappy-zones" in your life, you may find that those are the times you were put in a situation where you could not be yourself (partially or fully). Sometimes we might have "valid" restraints, but most times it may be that we have just accepted the situation (including our new-self), and decided to live with it. 

And being yourself doesn't mean carrying the "go to hell" attitude! It also doesn't mean being arrogant or ignoring other people's influence on our lives. Actually, it's exactly opposite. It's about listening carefully to your inner voice, and being humble to your own soul. By doing that, you will automatically be humble to others, because u will start putting some soul into everything you do, and say. And that's my friends is the highway to happiness! 

So, next time, when u start being unhappy, ask yourself, "Have I started being someone else?"  

As the lyrics from a famous song goes: "Happiness runs in the circular motion, you can have everything if you let your self be!"- 1968, Donovan (Scottish singer)

Cheers! to being yourself!

---

(Gems of the day, Feb 19, 2011)